On Friendships

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately about friendship and what it takes to be a good friend. I think in terms of being a good friend to someone, I am a 5 out of 10 in terms of meeting the terms of a good friend.  I am loyal and honest in my friendships and I do value the people in my life.  However, I am a lazy friend and I will be the first to admit it.  I do not go out of my way to make an effort to spend time with my friends.  I don’t “go the extra mile” for my pals most of the time and rely on them to make the first move to schedule times for us to hang out.

Yes, a large part of that is because I am a lazy friend, but it’s also because I don’t value myself enough.  I have read that you have to love and respect yourself first before anyone else and that having a great relationship with yourself is the key to having great relationships with others.  Well, to be honest, I don’t value myself too much.  I am very hard on myself, giving myself many putdowns on a regular basis.  Quite frankly, I just don’t think I’m good enough in my own eyes.  The thing is when we feel we are not good enough or worthy of love and attention, our relationships with others suffer.  One must first love and respect oneself before one can truly find those same relationships in others.

Lastly, I am an introvert.  Although I enjoy the company of friends and family, I do love my alone time as well.  I cherish my eveings alone now and then to chill, relax and just do whatever I want for a few hours with no interruptions.  Sometimes I think I spend too muc time alone and can become a hermit so I am working on getting myself out there in the world a bit more.

I think the keys for me to grow as a friend is to be more outgoing, less lazy, and start valuing myself more.  With a little hard work and insight, I can grow and maintain positive friendships for years to come.  What about you? How do you feel about your relationships with others?