A Brief Rant

I am 38 days away from the big wedding day, which is stressful enough in and of itself.  Then, to top it off, my fiance's grandparents decide that they want to have additional people added to our guest list or else they are not attending. Really? Cuz it's about you, right?  So, my lovely fiance, without consulting me, took it upon himself to decide that these extra people are going to be invited and promised his family without even discussing it with me.  I. am. pissed.

I know I may come off sounding like a spoiled brat but our location only holds 100 people. We specifically chose the guest list months ago and that should have been end of discussion.  Furthermore, if his grandparents are going to be vindictive about coming to the wedding and making a bunch of demands, then maybe they should rethink coming at all. Mine aren't after all.

The only good news in this is that I decided to go for a 3 mile run instead of stuff my face with booze or food.  So that's something, at least.

30 Days

To get myself motivated a bit, I have decided to do a 30 day challenge encompassing two things: eliminate alcohol and increase running.  So, my 30 day challenge, which started September 19th, is to run at least 4 days a week for a minimum of a mile each day and second, no alcohol consumption until October 19th.

For some people, this probably seems very easy and I have to say it's not too crazy of a challenge but I am a girl who likes a cocktail or two in the evenings now and then and who enjoys a glass of wine with dinner...like last night but I abstained! So, this one is a good start for me and I am hoping it will be a great way to reduce my desire for alcohol while increasing my love for running.

It's been a bit of a rough start in that I really enjoy my wine and the occasional beer but I have been strong so far this week and have rewarded myself with an iced coffee for my efforts.  I have also finished two runs for the week and have just two more to go, hopefully one tomorrow and another on Tuesday, I think.  So, a fairly good start so far to my little challenge.

Beyond the 30 days, I have also picked 5 things I want to accomplish for the next 6 months, but I will save that for the next post. I am a girl who loves lists, goals and challenges so hopefully all these motivational tactics pay off. 

Live boldly every day!

In Need of an Active Career

I know I dedicated Tuesday as my weight day, but seeing as I obviously missed out yesterday, today will have to suffice. As I recently stated, I am in need of some serious weight loss.  My goal would be to lose at least 65 pounds to reach my personal happy and healthy goal weight.  There's diet and exercise, of course, to get me there but I also think finding a more active career will help me too.

Back in high school and college, I was employed as a swim instructor/lifeguard.  This meant I was constantly moving around on deck or in the pool swimming with my students for hours on end.  And let me tell you, I. Looked. Awesome.  I was lean and mean with nice curves and tons of energy.  Later in my college years, I also started working at Curves for Women and loved being invested in helping ladies reach their goal weights.  It was a rewarding experience and kept in shape as well as we were encouraged to hula hoop and use the equipment during our work hours as well as help clients with their form and endurance.  That whole time period kept me lean and healthy...constantly looking for good foods and keeping on top of my weight.

Now that I am a paralegal and work in a office setting, I spend the majority of my day sitting down.  Then I usually grab a less-than-healthy meal for lunch and finish the day off exhausted from the draining task of sitting all day that I have a hard time getting motivated when I get home.  It's tiring just thinking about it!  What my body needs is to move more. I think finding a career that is more active would definitely help me to get myself back on track and keep me motivated to stay in shape.  Not to mention the fact that I do not care for my work now. It does not leave me feeling happy or fulfilled in the least bit. 

So, having already purchased the materials, I am going to start hitting the books to get my certification as a personal trainer and maybe even group fitness instructor...first the personal trainer.  I also want to find a job at a gym somewhere, even if I start out part time at the front desk. Just so I can get my feet in the door again and get that sense of purpose back in my veins.  This could be a great step in the right direction for both my waistline and my job concerns.

Bucket List

Back in college, my roommate and I, having more than a couple drinks under our belts, had one of those deep discussions about all the things we wanted to do before we die. The list started off small and innocent enough, but now it has grown exponentially.  I think there are about 86 items on my list right now.  I thought I'd share it and give you an idea of what my list entails.

Crystal's Bad Ass Bucket List

1. Stand at the top of the Sears Tower (now named something else but it'll always be Sears to me)
2. Go on a Segway tour
3. Master the 100 push-up challenge
4. Compete in a military-style obstacle course (mud run)
5. Lose a total amount of 100 pounds
6. Take pole dancing classes
7. Take stand up paddle boarding lessons
8. Become a "domestic goddess"
9. Make a million dollars 
10. Learn patience
11. Run a half marathon
12. Start an IRA
13. Quit my "day job"
14. Kick my negative habits: caffeine, overeating
15. Become an early riser
16. Be a wine connoisseur
17. Make a surf board coffee table
18. Learn to make candles
19. Master playing pool
20. Learn to play chess
21. Get MBA
22. Build a Habitat for Humanity home
23. Save a child through donations
24. Write children's book
25. Watch the turtles hatch in south Florida
26. Become a yoga instructor
27. Learn to fly a plane
28. Attend Mardi Gras in New Orleans
29. Become a computer geek
30. Learn to change a tire
31. Learn to change oil in my car
32. Achieve my ideal appearance
33. Ride a mechanical bull
34. Lighten UP!
35. Pay off all debts (mortgage not included)
36. Rent a hotel for the weekend and just chill
37. See the Grand Canyon
38. Go for a swamp boat ride in the Everglades
39. Climb Mount Everest
40. Get an master's degree
41. Volunteer abroad for at least a week
42. Write a novel
43. Travel to Italy / Paris
44. Become a gourmet cook
45. Learn to play guitar
46. Get married
47. Have a child
48. Get a black belt in karate
49. Become a First Responder
50. Learn a foreign language
51. Go to the shooting range and accurately shoot a target
52. Get scuba certification
53. Tryout for a reality TV show
54. Attend one of the following: Super Bowl, World Series, Olympics, Stanley Cup
55. Make 50 different cupcake flavors
56. Create a work of art i.e. painting
57. Restore a classic car or truck
58. Join an organization i.e. Red Cross, American Cancer Society
59. Learn to knit
60. Get motorcycle license
61. Take hip hop and samba dance lessons
62. Personal Trainer certification
63. Go cliff jumping
64. Go rock climbing somewhere
65. Learn to sail
66. Go parasailing
67. Do a triathlon
68. Take a hot air balloon ride
69. Learn to surf
70. Go hang gliding or paragliding
71. Run a marathon
72. Go on a zip line tour
73. Go white water rafting
74. Take a trapeze class
75. Go skydiving
76. Go bunjee jumping
77. Start an herb garden
78. Go to Las Vegas
79. Go to New York City
80. See Cirque du Soleil
81. Take a tour of the Amazon Rain forest
82. Visit Alcatraz
83. Throw a massive hotel party
84. Hike through a rain forest
85. Touch a stingray
86. Visit Boston
87. Own a house
88. Ride a scooter through Key West
89. Take 1 photograph each day for a year
90. Buy something for my parents that they couldn't afford themselves
91. Leave $50 tip for breakfast waitress
92. Tour the White House
93. Buy the perfect "little black dress"
94. Hike a volcano
95. Take black and white boudoir photographs

Those that are crossed out have been completed, all four of them I think. As you can see, this list has a wide variety of things on it from learning to adventure, fun time, and eliminating bad habits.  I do think it's not only possible to finish this list, but to keep adding on as well.  It's amazing how much we can accomplish in life when we want to.  Seize the day and enjoy every moment you have!

Fat Bride No More

Well, sorta. I was driving home from work this evening after a fulfilling day of keeping myself busy and came to a revelation:

I do not want to be fat anymore.

In the past 2 years, I have lost 65 pounds, bringing my weight down to a heavy-yet-manageable 165. Then some family trouble came about...wedding plans got crazy....and work got interesting and not in a good way (why must everything happen in 3's) and I now find myself having gained back 30 pounds, putting me at a very overweight 195.  Not cute. Not healthy. Not a happy camper.  I've been struggling with this weight fluctuation for the last few months but haven't done much about it.  A work out here...a workout there and then a nice, big pig out session over the weekend.  Victory is so not mine right now.

Today just feels different. I wasn't freaking out after a heavy meal, I've accepted that I'll be a fat bride for my wedding, and I haven't been insanely jealous of anyone who has lost a lot of weight recently to urge me on.  This is me just being totally sick and tired of being overweight and unhappy about it and it's time to do something about it again.  Yes, it sucks to fall off the weight-loss wagon, but as they say: it's not how many times you fall, but how quickly you pick yourself back up again.

It's time to brush myself off, pick myself up and get back on the weight-loss band wagon.  My goal weight is 131 pounds, which is what I weighed my senior year of college.  I was thin and toned and looked damn good! Yes that's 65 lbs away but it can be done.  Anything is possible. And with a 5'2" frame, 131 is not unreasonable at all.

So, I am dedicating Tuesday posts to weight loss/fitness/food love.  Hopefully most posts will be positive, and the negative ones will be learning experiences.  Time to take action. Let's go!

Doing Nothing is OK

We cram as much as we can into the work week and can't wait for the weekend to roll around so we can relax.  However, more often than not, relaxing on the weekend includes house cleaning, running errands, enjoying family time, getting up early, staying up late, and pretty soon we find ourselves staring down another Sunday evening wondering where the weekend went and why we are still exhausted.

This is a battle I find myself in more often than not on the weekends.  I always spend my Saturdays doing errands, all the house cleaning, cleaning the car, etc. and when the chores are finally all completed, I find it hard to just relax and enjoy the rest of the weekend.  Why? Cuz I feel guilty sitting around doing nothing.  I feel like I'm wasting my time by reading a good book or watching TV without being busy. It's stressful being relaxed cuz I'm sitting there thinking about all the things I should be doing while I'm sitting there relaxing. (That is a quote from my dad, who cannot sit still for more than an hour).  I am going to work on changing this a bit.

So this past weekend went as follows:  I spent Saturday busy as hell.  I went running, biking, ran errands, got my hair cut, did a major house cleaning, and enjoyed a nice evening with my fiance. And Sunday?  Sunday I actually took the time to relax.  I watched a good 3 or 4 hours of NCIS reruns (love that show) and floated in my pool with a book for another hour or so.  It was glorious.  I thought about being more productive during hour 2 or 3 of TV watching but convinced myself that just chillin' would be better and, quite frankly, I didn't want to do a damn thing!

Today, I was able to start the dreary Monday off in a good mood, was very productive and work, and still have a small reserve of energy left for this evening...I'm saving it for football :)

Bottom line is it's OK to do nothing now and then.  It's good to relax, unwind, and just enjoy the nothingness of the moment.  They are needed more than we realize.

Live Bold

What does it mean to live bold? Well, for me, that means stepping outside the box...defying the status quo...taking the road less traveled.  Although saying you want to do something and actually being able to do it are two different things.

Let's face it. It is so much easier to follow the norm of society.  To graduate high school in the top 10 percent of your class, to attend a university, graduate and get a job in your field. Get married. Have kids. Save money. You get the idea.  And I'll be honest, this is exactly the path I have been following. I graduated in the top of my class, went to college and am now working as a paralegal. I am getting married in two months and I'm sure we will buy a house next year after our lease is up.  So, in some aspects, I totally follow the status quo. I also like to live bold now and then. 

I've been skydiving.
I've gone bungee jumping.
I've traveled here and there...and want to keep on traveling.
I've had my joyous moments but I can say with certainty that it's not good enough.  I want more adventure, more experiences, more EVERYTHING.

So I say we all get out there and live bold. Do something exciting at least once a week. Live life to the fullest and have no regrets.

After all, most people only regret the things they never tried in life.

Stop Comparing

Such an easy thought to have but sometimes it can be so hard to implement.  Stop comparing.  Now, I cannot speak for men, although I am sure them also compare themselves to others, but we women are notorious for this.  We get it from the media, magazines, Internet articles, our friends, acquaintances, and yes, even our parents.  We are encouraged throughout life to look at other people's lives and compare them to ours.  We always hope to come out on top, but many times we do not succeed and end up feeling like a piece of crap over it.

I will admit that I am big on comparison shopping.  I constantly compare myself to other people...where are they at in their lives compared to me; how much money do they make; career status; married or single; children; the list goes on and on.  Sometimes I find myself on the "winning" end of the comparison and I can breathe a sigh of relief. Other times, though, I feel unproductive, an underachiever, less pretty, less thin, less successful.

The thing to remember, which I am trying to do myself, is that we are all different people and want different things in our lives. Not only that, but we are at different places in our lives no matter what our age may be.  The important thing is to be true to yourself and focus on what you want in life at your own pace.  Live for yourself, not for others.  I read a quote recently that stated, "Comparison is not equal in that you are comparing your insides to someone else's outsides."  That is so true. We need to look within ourselves and live in the moment.  I'm trying to do so one step at a time.

Another Day in Paradise

Sometimes when you get used to the same surroundings, you forget to appreciate what you have.  When I first moved to Florida, I was constantly in awe with how beautiful it was...the palm trees, beautiful beaches, sunny days and green as far as the eye can see.  Now that I've lived here for 5 years, I have forgotten how beautiful this place can be.  I've become so used to seeing palm trees, sand and green grass that I have come to take it for granted. 

Today, I got out of work early and really enjoyed my scenery on my home.  The skies are blue, the sun is shining and everything is green and growing.  So beautiful. I have lovely flowers of all colors on my patio, a tomato plant happily producing my favorite veggie, and a dog who loves to run outside and "chill" in the sun.  The little things we take for granted are still so beautiful and precious every day we are here on earth.  Sometimes all one needs to do is slow down, breathe deeply and enjoy. I live in my own little slice of paradise here. 

P.S.  I never get tired of looking out at the ocean.  As an avid water bug, I love everything about the water and I could stare at the water and listen to the waves for hours on end.  Awww....love it.

It's Race Time Again

Since I live in south Florida, you can imagine how hot and humid it is here during the summer...and spring...and parts of fall, so I am normally a relatively dormant runner during the long summer months.  However, now that September has arrived and races are starting to fill up the running calendars again, it's time to get back into running shape again.  I've done a few runs these past few weeks but nothing that I would call a schedule.  With the new month here, it's time to change that.

I signed up for a quick 5k race on Sept 24th.  That should give me plenty of time to get into 5k shape and get me interested in running again.  Sadly, it will still be quite hot and humid here but with a goal ahead of me, I can get myself to push through I think.  I am also hoping to do an Disney half marathon either January or February also so starting now will be perfect!

I guess there's no better time to start than now!  Oh wait, it's raining out. Well, maybe tomorrow :)